20 May 2011, Posted by admin in Thoughts, No Comments. Tagged , , ,

Raëlism


This article started off life as a niggling question in the back of our minds, a question which Google incubated and feed like a hungry baby chick. What is the world’s most extreme religion? Apart from the usual arguments for any of the big religions such as Christianity, Islam or oddities like Scientology, we took this down the cultish route and found a surprising answer. This will of course depend on your own views, but we’ve settled on Raëlism as the most whacked out, crazy cult out there. It is important to remember that a Raëlian is seeing this as a religion and not science fiction, welcome to the world of the UFO religion.

There is no God, well there is but he is not what you think. He’s an alien, well a whole race of them called Elohim and they created humanity by genetic manipulation and cloning. Actually they created all life on Earth, they parted the seas and made the continents. And this all happened around 25,000 years ago. The Raëlism leader, former French motor sport journalist, Claude Vorilhon met with the Elohim aliens in 1973 and they took him through the Bible to show him how they have been present throughout Human history but have been seen as angels, prophets and God rather than as alien visitors.

The good news for all you virgins out there is that they are pretty easy and big on open sexual experiences. Kinda like a big alien orgy with lots of moon boots and smoke machines, they often practice sensual meditation. As you may have guessed Raëlism isn’t too big on the theory of evolution, but in a move to bring the aliens back to Earth, and show everyone how right they’ve been, they are setting up a Raëlian Embassy which will serve as a spaceport for the aliens to use to visit us all at the low cost of $20 million. So if you’ve got some change lying around, why not send it onto the alien hunting Raelians?

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